We have made a thoughtful Valentine’s card for your loved-one(s). Click to download what will definitely make any girl swoon/cry/kiss you with tongues. We tested them on some girls we found and 99% of them cried, so you know they work because a girl crying means she loves you, like when the lady in Jaws does it.
Duuuuuh duh. Duuuuuh duh. Duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh DUH DUH! LOOK OUT IT’S A SHARK! SWIM FOR IT! LEAVE THE KIDS BEHIND! No, wait, it’s ok, that woman stopped him and we’re saved. How can we ever repay you.
This little treat is hammering around the interweb today like a killer shark. We’d love to say “YOU SAW IT HERE FIRST!” but that would be a real stinky lie. That’s right people, not only has the jaw-dropping Mad Decent annual party gone and dropped Jaws yet again with its huge fucking line up, but for the first time ever they’re taking you off land and on a 4-day floating music festival appropriately called Mad Decent Boat Party! The party will be taking over Norwegian Pearl November 12-16, 2014 and will cruise the Caribbean from Miami to Nassau to Great Stirrup Cay, our own private island in the Bahamas! More deets and the full line up after the jump.
Amazing selfie. Guys love chicks with a great selfie taking skills. And naked. And stuff. This chick just puts all of us in a good mood. The world has instantly become a much happier place.
Oh yeah, back to the point of this fucking post, we’re giving away a pair of tickets to see The Chainsmokers this Saturday night at Webster Hall, NYC. All you need to do to win is submit an epic selfie to us at email@example.com with the subject #SELFIE. Female nudity is encouraged! (TITS-4-TIXS™)
That’s right web peoples and mouse bashers, the super awesome Rosie Jones as nature intended her: wearing a massive fury hat and little else after the jump.
Happy Wednesday, readers. Sorry for the lack of activity on this ‘ere site this week – we’ve all been covered in glue and glitter, piecing together some stuff for the site for all you wonderful peoples.
Stay tuned for the resumption of normal service – Here’s some WASTE after the jump to hold you over. Lovely.